TWO IN A DAY (Because I have been inspired to do this 27-question thing)!

1. You can press a button that will make any one person explode. Who would you blow up?
I would blow up the person whose AIM sreenname is laxattakkk05, because he/she is a bigot.

2.You can flip a switch that will wipe any band or musical artist out of existence. Which one will it be?
I'd eighty-six whichever group is at the top of the "Screamo" genre currently.

3.Who would you really like to just punch in the face?
I'd like to sock the person who came up with the game show, "Deal Or No Deal."

4.What is your favorite cheese?
I quite like a nice runny Brie.

5.You can only have one kind of sandwich. Every sandwich ingredient known to humankind is at your immediate disposal. What kind will you make?
I'd figure out how to make exact copies of the Chicken Cutlet Grinder at Franklin Avenue Giant Grinders in Hartford. If you've never had one, please do, and then you'll know what I'm talking about.

6.You have the opportunity to sleep with the movie celebrity of your choice. We are talking no-strings-attached sex and it can only happen once. Who is the lucky celebrity of your choice?
This may sound superficial, but I'd have to say Jenna Jameson. I figure she'd be extremely talented in such an activity as the question outlines.

7.You have the opportunity to sleep with the music-celebrity of your choice. Who do you pick?
Maybe that gal Shakira. Especially if her "hips don't lie."

8. Now that you've slept with two different people in a row, you seem to be having an excellent day because you just came across a hundred-dollar bill on the sidewalk. Holy shit, a hundred bucks! How are you gonna spend it?
Since I'd be so elated with the events of the day, I'd probably just hold onto it or invest it.

9.You just got a free plane ticket to anywhere. You have to depart right now. Where are you gonna go?
I'd settle for a ticket to Myrtle Beach, headed for the family condo in Pawleys Island.

10.Upon arrival to the aforementioned location, you get off the plane and discover another hundred-dollar bill. Shit! Now that you are in the new location, what are you gonna do?
Pay for the cab fare to the condo, necessary food provisions, and settle down for a quiet weekend of golf.

11.An angel appears out of Heaven and offers you a lifetime supply of the alcoholic beverage of your choice. It is...?
Well I am not really enamored of alcohol, so I'd choose perhaps an exquisite red wine, and sell a bunch of the bottles for a nice profit.

12.Rufus appears out of nowhere with a time-traveling phone booth. You can go anytime in the PAST. What time are you traveling to and what are you going to do when you get there?
I'd travel back (assuming I could return to the present at any time) to Athens and listen to Homer recite "The Odyssey" (I hope that since it's a sophisticated time machine, I can be endowed with a thorough understanding for Ancient Greek).

13.You discover a beautiful island upon which you may build your own society. You make the rules. What is the first rule you put into place?
RULE 1: Be excellent to each other (I'm still happy from Rufus' visit)!

14.You have been given the opportunity to create the half-hour TV show of your own design. What is it called and what's the premise?
It's just a camera crew following me around dirung the day. The name of the show is "Aren't You Glad You're Not This Kid?"

15.What is your favorite curse word?
I say "dammit" a lot (I know. Hardcore, right?)

16.One night you wake up because you heard a noise. You turn on the light to find that you are surrounded by MUMMIES. The mummies aren't really doing anything, they're just standing around your bed. What do you do?
I'd say, "Toilet paper delivery at THIS time of night?" Then they'd groan, leave, and I'd go back to sleep.

17.Your house is on fire, holy shit! You have just enough time to run in there and grab ONE inanimate object. Don't worry, your loved ones and pets have already made it out safely.So what's the item?
I'm probably going to sound like the biggest sentimantal softie in the world, but I might save my stuffed lion, "Calliope," which my late grandmother gave to me at birth. "Callie" kinda keeps a symbolic watch over my bed. Sappy, eh?

18.The Angel of Death has descended upon you. Fortunately, the Angel of Death is pretty cool and in a good mood, and it offers you a half-hour to do whatever you want before you bite it. Whatcha gonna do in that half-hour?
Have a good meal with family, then snap on some great headphones and put on Gershwin's "Rhapsody in Blue," with the ending to coincide with my own.

19.You accidentally eat some radioactive vegetables. They were good, and what's even cooler is that they endow you with the super-power of your choice! What's it gonna be?
The power to duplicate super powers for myself.

20.You can re-live any point of time in your life. The time-span can only be a half-hour, though. What half-hour of your past would you like to experience again?
A couple bus rides to golf team practice freshman year. Those sure were raucous. I miss those days.

21.You can erase any horrible experience from your past. What will it be?
I don't know if there's anything I'd really erase. I haven't had any great embarassments, since I'm such a weirdo anyhow.

22.You got kicked out of the country for being a time-traveling heathen who sleeps with celebrities and has super-powers. But check out this cool shit... you can move to anywhere else in the world! Bitchin'! What country are you going to live in now?
Probably England. It's close to continental Europe, as well as Scotland and Ireland, which are phenomenally golf and culture-rich.

23.This question still counts, even for those of you who are under age. Check it out. You have been eternally banned from every single bar in the world except for ONE. Which one is it gonna be?
The bar at Max Downtown, so I can still have dinner there.

24.Hopefully you didn't mention this in the super-powers question.... If you did, then we'll just expand on that. Check it out... Suddenly, you have gained the ability to FLOAT!!! Whose house are you going to float to first, and be like "Dude, check it out... I can FLOAT!"?
My own house, and I'll just pester my family like I always do. But now I'll just be floating.

25.The constant absorption of magical moonbeams mixed with the radioactive vegetables you consumed earlier has given you the ability to resurrect the dead famous-person of your choice. So which celebrity will you bring back to life?
Since my power is the power of duplication of powers, I'd bring back Jim Morrison (musical genius) and Payne Stewart (then the US Ryder Cup team would have a chance.

26.The Celestial Gates of Beyond have opened, much to your surprise because you didn't think such a thing existed. Death appears. As it turns out, Death is actually a pretty cool entity, and happens to be in a fantastic mood. Death offers to return the friend/family-member/person, etc. of your choice to the living world. Who will you bring back?
My father's mother or mother's mother. It sucks not to have any living grandparents.

27.What's your theme song?
None stand out, but since I'm on the proverbial spot, I'll take "Nobody's Perfect," by Mike + The Mechanics

If you've read all of this, bravo. Please IM with comments if you are so inclined. These are some pretty eclectic questions.

Ruminations

During my daily routine of casual observation of people around me, I've heard of some crazy times (or at least allusions to crazy times, because let's face it, I'm not in many "inner circles"). Many people seem to have interesting stories. That is, except me. I'm pretty pathetically boring--unable to relate to my peers. I really don't have any tales of intrigue, mystery, or excitement, from my personal life. That is to say, none that would interest a really wide group of people (most of my interesting experiences have to do with golf, and not many people want to hear about that)) Socially, therefore, I have very little going for me. If anyone has any suggestions that do not involve drugs or alcohol for adding a little "umph" into the fabric of my life, please feel free to throw some out.