... I'm just not that enamored of spending more than an hour by the sea's sandy edge. I did this today, for the first time all summer, at the behest of my family. We only walked around searching for shells, so the experience was somewhat bearable. Trust me, any more of a commitment on my part would benefit no one.
For starters, the thought of my bare torso is enough to send the Pawleys Island Police Department into a frenzy; what with my decided stoutness of shape, not to mention a golf shirt-shaped tan line (my fair Greek skin needs no sunscreen, so my bronze arms are the only evidence of outdoor activity) that would send onlookers to area hospitals with cardiac troubles resulting from either uncontrollable laughter or crippling fright.
Another part of the beach which does not at all agree with me is sand. While the idea of walking barefoot in the sand, feet sinking in at every step may be a liberating one to some people, I just find it annoying. The whiteness of the sand did not help either, as I found myself waddling (more pronounced than usual) along, expending a great deal of energy in the unstable sand, squinting and sometimes closing my eyes altogether.
Perhaps I will eventually see in the beach what others see; they're nice to look at, but after a short while, my eyes are ready to find some other stimulation. But for now, I'm content to make a once-a-year pilgrimage to the sandy expanse, just to confirm that nothing has changed. Today, my favorite part of going to the beach was my footlong hot dog and onion rings afterwards. Besides, if I wanted to go nearly blind and come home sticky, there are probably other, less common alternatives.
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3 comments:
Amen to the beach thing...
and did it ever occur to you that if you didn't eat so many footlongs and onion rings you wouldnt look so bad without a shirt on?
a word of advice: get some sunglasses. The beach kicks ass. it's one of very few places where it is perfectly acceptable to sleep in public! Not to mention run around wearing as much or as little clothing as you would like, (get a surf shirt if you're self concious)and have a pretty view of the ocean.
why are all your blog entries complaints? you sound exactly like Lemony Snicket. (pen name of guy who wrote "A Series of Unfortunate Events")
I'm much more comfortable sleeping in my own bed thank you. Not to mention the oppressive heat that comes with a large area of sand, with no shade in sight.
In terms of clothing, I showed restraint in declining to complain about the 200 pound-plus women and 300 plus-pound men who wear bathing suits that they should not wear.
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